


Where Do We Go (Oh) When Our Prayers Are Answered?

by JohannsViolin (Clare_Hope)



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Gen, Post-Episode: e067-069 Story and Song Parts 1-3
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-01
Updated: 2019-12-01
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:02:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21626515
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Clare_Hope/pseuds/JohannsViolin
Summary: The Starblaster crew saved the worlds, and they have their whole lives ahead of them now. But before they can get to the rest of their lives, they have to get through the first night. Where do they go?
Relationships: Barry Bluejeans/Lup, Davenport & Merle Highchurch, Lup & Taako (The Adventure Zone), Magnus Burnsides & The Director | Lucretia
Comments: 9
Kudos: 51





	Where Do We Go (Oh) When Our Prayers Are Answered?

**Author's Note:**

> In which I explore the hours immediately after the final battle against the Hunger. Enjoy some found family fluff! <3
> 
> (Title comes from Lindsey Stirling's song "Where Do We Go". The entire song has hella TAZ vibes, it particularly makes me think of Lucretia.)

_ "Hey everybody! Johann was right! We won!" _

_ But what happens now? _ was the question on everyone's mind as celebrations died down and the realization that most of their homes were destroyed started dawning on them. The moon base was in ruins, and the Bureau of Balance employees one by one figured out that they had nowhere to return to that night. The seven birds--a shattered, exhausted family--began to understand what they had to come to terms with. They had won. That meant that their 112 year journey was over.

_ Where do we go now? _

The glow from Lup's spectral form began to dim slightly. She was  _ tired _ . She could see her family around her and wanted to curl up in their arms and cry for the next several days, but she couldn't do any of that in this form. Instead, she hovered between her brother and her lover and waited for someone to make a decision.

Merle couldn't help but stare at the remains of Neverwinter. There were so many people injured and dead. He felt a sudden terror. Mookie and Mavis had been in Goldcliff. Were they safe? What would he do if they weren't safe?

Unable to take his eyes off of Lup, Barry wasn't even considering the immediate future. He had Lup back. He had  _ found her _ \--well, Taako had found her. That was everything he had wanted over the past twelve years. He was ready for whatever the future brought as long as Lup was there with him.

He wouldn't show it, but without the fight to focus on, Davenport was struggling not to lose himself in the waves upon waves of memories that kept crashing over him. Even if he had wanted to, even if he had tried, he probably wouldn't have been able to put words to all of his feelings. Over a decade of only being able to say his own name was going to put a bit of a damper on his communication skills.  _ Do  _ relief _ and  _ sad _ make sense together?  _ he wondered.

Magnus was the only one of the birds who was openly weeping. He was the happiest he had been in quite a long time. Paradoxically, he was also the saddest. He had just realized that six of the most important people in his whole life had never met a seventh. His family would never meet Julia, and that realization made the wound feel just as raw as the day he had lost her.

After everything, the only thought that kept running on a loop in Taako's mind was  _ I want to go home _ . That confused him, because he didn't  _ have _ a home. He had never had a home. He didn't have a home, and he didn't have a family...but here they were anyway, against every instinct he had developed over the past decade. His eyes alighted on Lup, still trying to make sense of her, and he suddenly understood that  _ home _ was in his sister's arms.  _ Well, I can't exactly go there either right now--she doesn't have arms. _ He let out a mildly hysterical giggle.

Lucretia didn't know how to make this right. She had used all of her power and strength to finish the battle and contain the Hunger permanently, but now she was surrounded by her family, who she had hurt deeply and irrevocably. She knew some of them would forgive her--it was just who they were. That didn't mean that she would ever be able to fully forgive herself.

A half-elf none of them recognized approached them hesitantly. "Excuse me, I…"

Taako almost said something about not giving out autographs at the moment. He held his tongue.

"I run a large inn on the outskirts of town, it somehow managed to stay standing--I've been offering free shelter to anyone who needs a place to stay tonight, and I...well, I thought maybe I'd see if any of you…" The half-elf looked nervous.

Somehow, Barry found himself as the one answering them. He put his hand on their shoulder. "We wouldn't want to take up space if someone else needed it more," he told them.

"I think I gotta go to Goldcliff," Merle said. "Hecuba isn't picking up her stone, and I just...gotta make sure--" Suddenly, a voice came over his stone. He rushed away to talk to them, but everyone else could see by the delighted relief on his face that it was good news.

Lucretia swayed where she stood. Her vision blurred and turned white for a second. When she came to, Magnus's arm was around her waist. He had made sure she didn't fall. "Creesh, you need to rest," he told her softly. "Let's take this nice person up on their offer, 'kay?" She nodded wearily and let him lead her along after the half-elf.

Davenport walked up to Merle, who was placing his stone of farspeech back into his pocket and wiping his eyes. "Everything okay?" he asked.

Merle nodded and grabbed him into a hug. "My kids are safe," he said, and although Davenport had stiffened when Merle's arms had gone around him, he managed to return the hug.

"That's good. That's really good, Merle," he said.

Her form shuddering with emotion, Lup  _ really _ wished that she could cry. Both Barry and Taako reached out to steady her, and their hands went right through her. That almost made her laugh. "I love you," she told them. "Oh, I have  _ missed _ saying that!"

Taako choked back a sob. "Lup," he whispered. "Lup."

"Taako? Oh, hey, I'm here. I'm  _ here _ , see?"

And she was, but Taako felt like his head was going to implode with the weight of so many contradictory memories. He pressed his palms to his temples.

Barry, who had been through this multiple times already, touched his arm. "Taako? I know it's hard. It gets better soon, you're gonna be fine. It really does get easier."

"Why does it hurt?" Taako gasped.

Lup made a worried sound. "What's wrong with him?" she asked Barry fearfully, the edges of her form fluttering as she tried to wind herself around her twin in a sort of ghostly hug.

"Too many memories all at once. He'll be okay in a few days," Barry explained. "Okay, Taako, just breathe."

As Taako broke down into tears, Lup flared back up brightly. "I can't hold you," she said in distress. "Taako, please don't cry! Barry--"

"I've got him." Barry took his brother-in-law into his arms and held him tightly. "I've got you, Taako, just breathe and try to remember slowly."

"There's s-still people everywhere," Taako said. He was sobbing into Barry's shoulder.

Lup spread her robe out to create a shield to give him some privacy. "Maybe we should follow Maggi and Lucy to that inn," she suggested. She made eye contact with Barry. "You two need sleep even if I don't."

"Sleep?" Barry shook his head. "I have you back, Lup. I'm never gonna sleep again, I just wanna keep staring at you."

Both of the twins laughed at that, though Taako was still crying as well. "She's right," he said. " _ Gods _ , I could sleep for a fucking decade."

"Let's go, then," Barry conceded. He kept his arm around Taako's shoulders and Lup hovered on his other side, walking in the same direction that Magnus and Lucretia had gone, towards the inn.

Merle watched them go. Part of him wanted to join them, but he knew they would be alright. He still wanted to go to Goldcliff. "Hey, Capnport? Where are you gonna go tonight?"

The captain shrugged helplessly.

_ Oh...he's having trouble with words. _ "Wanna come to Goldcliff with me? My kids are there, and I'd love for ya to meet 'em," Merle invited. "I bet we could find someone willing to drive a wagon for a couple of universe saviors. In fact, I know a pair of tree-ladies who are probably heading that way, if we can catch 'em."

Davenport nodded.

Sitting in the back of Sloane and Hurley's battlewagon, the two of them sat quietly. Davenport  _ wanted _ to talk. He wished that he could find the words, that he could talk easily and comfortably with Merle like he could back on the ship. After almost an hour, Davenport managed to say, "Your kids...tell me about them?"

Merle's expression got wistful. "I've got two of 'em. Mookie is eight, Mavis is fifteen."

"Huh?"  _ We haven't been here for fifteen years. _

With a laugh, Merle said, "Mavis is from Hecuba's first marriage. He died before Mavis turned one, I met her when she was six. She was calling me 'dad' before me 'n Hecuba went on our third date."

Davenport smiled.

"And she's so bright, so clever. I've never met a kid so clever. Well, little Ango might give Mavie a run for her money, but it'd be close. And Mookie…" Merle said with a chuckle. "He's a good, good kid. Always getting into trouble 'cause he has so much energy. Unruly hair always gettin' in his eyes, reminds me of me when I was a kid."

"I remember...you showed me pictures. Before we left."  _ I remember _ . That was a strange sensation.

"Ha! Yeah, that's right. I did," Merle recalled.

Suddenly, Davenport yawned. "It feels odd, to be tired...after everything. Today."

"I don't think I'll be able to sleep until I've hugged my kids again," Merle replied.

"Tired is... _ normal _ . None of this is normal."

"Yeah, I understand."

Being understood was also a feeling Davenport hadn't had in a long time. He tried to disguise his unwanted tears by yawning again and rubbing his eyes.

Merle wasn't fooled that easily. He didn't say anything, just scooted closer on the little bench and put his arm around his old friend's shoulder.

"Mind if I...take a nap?"

"Go for it, cap'n. I'll wake ya up when we get there."

At the inn, Magnus had opted to simply scoop Lucretia up and carry her up the stairs to the room that the half-elf directed them to. She was only a little mortified. Mostly, she was just grateful that Magnus didn't hate her...or if he did, he was being very kind about not showing it.

"You wanna just go to bed?" Magnus asked.

"Magnus, I...I'd like to talk to you." She gestured towards the bed, indicating that they should sit. He set her down and sat next to her, holding both of her hands. "A-are you angry at me?" she asked, faltering slightly.

"No." Magnus squeezed her hands. "I'm not. I don't...y'know, I don't agree with everything that you did, Creesha." He wanted her to understand that. "And you did hurt us. Taako especially."

She winced.

"But you…you did what you thought was right, and how could I ever be angry at you for that? You're my sister, Lucretia. I forgave you the moment I remembered what you had done," Magnus informed her.

Lucretia turned her gaze upwards to stop the tears from falling. "Thank you," she whispered. "I'm sorry."

"I've already forgiven you," he said again, putting his hand on the side of her face and wiping away the first tear that managed to slip loose. "Lucretia, Creesh, shhhh. It's gonna be okay, I promise. We're all gonna be okay, all of us. Even Taako can't hold a grudge forever. It's alright, it's okay." He had to pull her into a gentle hug as she shook with tiny sobs. He could tell by the way she leaned into him and clung that she hadn't gotten a hug like this in quite a while. "I've gotcha."

"I m-missed you."

"I missed you, too. Even though I didn't know it." Magnus was struggling to talk past the lump in his throat. "And Lucretia? I'm...more than a little heartbroken r-right now."

"Why--" Lucretia felt his shoulders shake. She put her hand on his hair, stroking comfortingly. "Magnus?"

"I-I'm sorry, it's j-just, you guys n-never got t-to m-meet Julia!"

Her eyes stung with more tears. "I'm sorry, Magnus, I'm so sorry," she murmured. "I'm sure she was wonderful. I'm so sorry I never met her."

"Wh-when we…" But Magnus couldn't get any more words out. Lucretia shushed him softly.

"Tell me later?" she said. "After we rest. It will be easier then."

That was a good idea. Magnus nodded and continued to cry.

Downstairs, the half-elf owner of the inn was showing Barry, Lup, and Taako to another room. "Goodnight--and I'm sure you've already gotten plenty of this, but...thank you. Thank you for saving our world."

Taako waved his hand dismissively. "Pssh, natch, it was nothing. Old news at this point. I didn't even care. What's one more world?"

Lup rolled her eyes and wished she could physically poke him in the ribs. "My brother is being ridiculous, and thank you for giving us a place to stay the night."

"You're being very generous," Barry agreed. He nudged Taako along until they were in the room.

Taako collapsed into the armchair in the corner. "Dibs," he mumbled.

Settling down on the arm of the chair, Lup curled her form as close to him as she could. "Are you gonna get some sleep?"

"Uh-uh. Probably can't, no matter how much I'd like to."

Lup hummed softly. "I promise I'll still be here when you wake up."

He wanted to make himself believe her. "Can I...can I talk to you? Just us, Lup. I need to…"

Barry was already heading towards the door. As much as he didn't want to leave Lup, he wasn't in the least bit offended that Taako needed to be alone with her. And after all, Barry had spent the last twelve years alone. Another hour or so wouldn't kill him. "Let me know when to come back--I might go check on Mags and Lucretia."

"Thanks, babe." Lup waited until the door was closed. "Koko? What did you want to talk to me about?"

He stared at her. " _ Everything _ ."

"Oh, me too! Taako, I've missed you  _ so much _ . We have forever to talk now, okay? I'm never gonna leave again."

"Don't--please don't make promises you can't be sure you can keep." Taako rubbed his eyes. Why was he so  _ fucking tired _ ? "I just want to talk."

"So talk," Lup said. "I'm here."

"I…"  _ Where do I start? _

Lup could see how hard this was for him. Her soul ached with sympathy. Needing to cheer him up, she said, "Tell me about this Grim Reaper of yours."

Sure enough, Taako gave her a small smile. A bit of color rose to his cheeks. "Kravitz. His name is Kravitz. But you knew that, 'cause you've been eavesdropping on every single date we've had."

"Okay, yes, but I did try to tune out most of it 'cause  _ yuck _ . I'd rather hear you tell me about it in person."

"I like him a lot," Taako said simply. "He's sweet, and honestly really dorky. And he's very hot when he doesn't look like a skeleton. Also he is almost definitely going to try and arrest you and Barry."

Lup snorted.

"Seriously, you two are walking talking death criminals. Or. Floating talking death criminals."

"Didn't you guys cheat him at a game of cards for your souls or something? I think we can handle it," she dismissed. "We just saved the world, Koko, there's gotta be an exception to the rule."

"Yeah, I'm sure he can figure something out."

Lup smiled. "So you really like him, huh?" she asked quietly.

"Yeah. No, actually, Lup. I think I love him."

She gasped. "Oh, wow."

"I know, I know," Taako laughed. "Took you and Barry fifty years to figure it out and here I am saying it after less than a year of knowing this guy. But I remember…" He paused. "Lup, we have that thing. Veto power. If you ever...if you don't like him…"

"He seems good," Lup was quick to say. "He's been good to you. Don't get me wrong, if he ever hurts you, I'll kick his ass. But no, he seems cool. You gotta introduce us properly at some point, sometime when the world isn't ending."

"Really soon, I hope," agreed Taako.

Lup's form flickered. "Double date?"

Bursting out laughing, Taako said, " _ Yeah _ , that'd be a sight. Literal Death on a double date with his boyfriend's sister and brother-in-law who are both liches and necromancers. I love that so much." Lup was laughing as well. It felt good. Much better than crying.

Barry had tried being alone in the hallway of the inn for approximately half a minute before deciding he'd had enough of that. He asked the half-elf to point him towards the room where Magnus and Lucretia had gone, and went to join them. He tapped very quietly at the door.

"Who's there?" Magnus asked in a sleepy mumble.

"It's Barry."

"Oh--c'mon in. Just shh, Lucy's out."

He opened the door and stepped inside. Sure enough, Lucretia was sleeping soundly with her head in Magnus's lap. It was such a familiar sight. How many times had he walked into the common room on the Starblaster to see them curled up together like this?

But no, it was different now. Lucretia was so much older. She looked weary and worried even in her sleep. Both of them had clearly been crying, which in and of itself wasn't unusual, but Magnus had a different sort of sadness behind his eyes than Barry had ever seen on him.

"How are--" Magnus cleared his throat, trying to make his voice less shaky. "How are Lup and Taako?"

"They needed some twin time." Barry came closer. "Can I sit with you two?"

"Course."

Barry sat down on the edge of the bed. He reached out carefully and touched Lucretia's cheek. She didn't stir. "Is she doing alright?"

"Oh, y'know," Magnus said with a shrug and a forced smile.

"So, no."

"Yeah."

Barry sighed. "I would have thought that it would have felt different than this when it was all over. It's over now, but it just feels...I don't even know what it feels like. It's so new."

"You've got Lup back, though." The smile on his face was even more forced now. "That must be nice."

"It's  _ so _ nice." Barry looked up at the ceiling, distracted for a moment by thoughts of Lup. It took him a moment to notice that Magnus had started crying again. "Oh, oh no. What did I do?"

"You didn't--" Magnus buried his face in his hands. "I'm sorry, I am happy for you, I  _ am _ , I just…"  _ Why is everything making me cry about Julia today? _

"Magnus? Hey, hey…" said Barry gently. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Magnus shook his head, wiping his eyes. "I don't want to wake Lucy. Another time?"

"Yeah, sure."  _ So much happened to them without my knowledge. It's gonna take another decade just to catch up with everyone. _ Barry had a hunch about why Magnus was crying--he had gotten glimpses of his life just by watching what had happened in Wonderland. He knew that Magnus had been married, and that his wife had been killed. Of course Barry getting Lup back would stir up that grief. "Let me know if there's anything I can do."

"Thanks, I…" Magnus leaned over onto his shoulder, sniffling. "I just wanna sleep, Barry. I think everything will be easier to deal with tomorrow."

"It will be," Barry told him. It was a testament to how trusting Magnus was that even after ten years apart, he took Barry's reassurance without question and closed his eyes with a soft mumble that he couldn't quite hear. "What?"

"Just said...g'night, Barry."

"Night, Mags. Want me to turn the lights off?"

"Leave them on, please?"

"I will." He patted Magnus's hand and waited as he fell asleep, then carefully laid him down on the bed and covered both him and Lucretia in blankets. He left them there and went back to the downstairs hallway. Sitting down outside the door to the room where the twins were talking, he could hear Lup's voice on the other side of the wall. It was the most comforting sound in the world. Barry closed his eyes and let it wash over him. It felt so normal that for a moment, his guard dropped. That was just as long as it took for him to fall asleep.

It was dark by the time they arrived in Goldcliff. Merle thanked Hurley and Sloane profusely and hugged them both several times before saying goodnight and waving them off to their tree home. He had hated to wake Davenport, but they were being dropped off in front of the building where Hecuba and the kids were staying, so he had to.

"Lead the way," Davenport told him. He was still tired, although the nap had done him some good. He wasn't stumbling over his words as much.

They went into the building, a large touristy hotel that hadn't been knocked down in the Hunger's attack. Lots of people were taking shelter here for the night. Some were injured. Merle quickly exhausted a few spell slots to tend to the wounded on his way to the small room that Hecuba had given him directions to. Davenport kept his head down. He knew they were being recognized and wanted to make it clear that he was not available for conversation at the moment, thank you very much.

When they reached the room, Merle was almost bowled over by his kids throwing themselves at him and hugging him. Both of them were talking incessantly.

"When I lost my glasses, I got separated from Mom--"

"--didja  _ really _ fly in a ship through space?!"

"--and the tree ladies, they saved me--"

"When are you gonna teach me how to do all that a'venture stuff?"

"I was so scared, Dad! Are we really safe now?"

"We're safe," Merle promised them, and hugged them both tighter. "Kids, it's past your bedtime, but I brought a friend for you to say hi to."

The two of them caught sight of Davenport and stared. Mavis spoke first. "You're the Captain, right?" she asked.

"That's me," he replied.

"You're  _ so cool _ ," Mookie said enthusiastically. "Hi! Hi! Will you teach me how to drive a ship?"

"Um. Maybe someday," Davenport said with a chuckle. "You're...a bit young to be...piloting anything...bigger than a kayak." His sentences were getting fragmented again, but the kids didn't seem to mind or even notice.

"We can talk about it tomorrow, after everyone's gotten a good night's sleep," said Merle.

"I'm not sleepy!" Mookie argued. Mavis and Hecuba corralled him over to the bed. In less than a minute, he was sound asleep in Mavis's lap. She wasn't far behind.

"You're gonna be here tomorrow, right, Dad?" she yawned.

"Of course I will," he assured her. "Goodnight, baby." They left the room, not wanting to keep the kids awake by talking. "Do you wanna find somewhere to spend the night, Cap'n? Or, I dunno, we could play some cards and just talk," Merle said thoughtfully.

"The...the latter. Sounds nice." They found a quiet spot behind the hotel to sit down. Merle had a deck of cards in his bag.

"I promise these aren't the cheating deck," Merle said. "Should I deal?"

"Sure."

As he shuffled and dealt the cards, Merle said, "It's a lot to take in, huh? It looks like we're picking up right where we left off, but...it's been a long road."

"You're missing an eye," Davenport pointed out. "It was still there...before you left. For Wonderland. Right?"

Merle shuddered. Wonderland was far too close in his memories. "Yeah, glad my kids haven't asked about that yet. My darkvision is totally gone, too. Lucky I'm a beach dwarf and not a cave dwarf, that'd be super inconvenient."

Davenport wasn't sure what to say about that. He could recall what it had been like when Lucretia had gone to Wonderland and returned twenty years older, trembling, guilt-stricken, a bit smeared with blood from the battles. She had apologized to him over and over. She did that a lot when it was just the two of them. It was impossible to console her. Anything he tried to do or say had only ever made it worse. Now he understood why.

"Cap'n? Your turn," Merle prompted gently.

He startled. "What?"

"Your turn in the game," repeated Merle. He frowned. "Where'd you go? You drifted off somewhere for a second."

"Oh...doesn't matter." Davenport played his next card. "Don't you want...some sleep?"

"Maybe in a bit."  _ First I gotta figure out if you're gonna be okay. _ "What do you think you're gonna do? Now that it's over. Have you thought about it yet?"

"Not yet." In fact, the question was terrifying. Davenport's hands were shaking as he played another card. "It's...going to be...hard. Not to f-feel...lost. Here."

"Yeah, I guess I'm lucky to have somewhere to go already," Merle said, watching him carefully. "Before we got to this world, did you ever think about what you'd wanna do if we ever got out of the cycles? If we found somewhere to settle?"

"I never...lost hope of...getting  _ home _ , Merle," Davenport said, having to force the words out painfully. "This is...not home. And there's not...really...any hope left. Is there."

Merle sighed. "Of getting back to the world we came from? No, Cap'n, I don't think so. I think we're just gonna have to do the best we can with what we've got now. Home is where you hang your hat, after all."

"I haven't...got a hat," Davenport said with a shrug.

"Home is where the heart is?" Merle offered. "Is that any better?"

"Maybe. Not sure if...that works...either."

"I'm all out of clichès, then. I guess home has to be wherever you make it. Maybe you just gotta search until you find it."

Davenport thought about that.  _ Searching. Searching sounds right.  _ "Maybe I'll just...travel. All over. This is a big world, isn't it?"

"It's pretty big, yeah," Merle confirmed.

"And I've hardly seen...any of it." He looked up at the sky. Back home, he had known the name of every star in the night sky and how to navigate using them. "I'd like to."

"That's a great idea!" exclaimed Merle. "You could travel the seas. You could be the captain of an ocean ship instead of a starship."

"Maybe so."

"But you have to come and visit all the time. My kids are gonna want you to teach them everything you know," Merle added. "So you can't just disappear and never let us hear from ya. Stay in touch."

Davenport smiled. "I will." He looked down at his cards and set them down face-up on the table. "Also, I won."

"Huh. You sure did," said Merle. "Just like old times."

"Just like old times," Davenport echoed.

"Should we let Barry back in?" Lup said after she and Taako had spent almost a full minute in silence after their conversation died down, just staring at each other and trying to take it all in. "Maybe you can convince him to get some sleep."

"Yeah, okay," Taako replied, slightly reluctantly. He had wanted to be alone with Lup for as long as he could, but he understood that he didn't have a monopoly on her time. And really, he had missed Barry as well. He got off the bed and went over to the door. "Hey, Barold, want to--oh…"

Lup floated over. "What?"

"I don't think we need to convince him," Taako whispered.

"Aww…" Lup was filled with fondness at the sight of Barry sitting against the wall, fast asleep. He was snoring softly--how she had  _ missed _ that sound. "Oh, no, we have to wake him up to get him into the room. I don't want to leave him out here all night."

"Leave it to me." Taako had gotten a half-asleep Barry to bed plenty of times when Lup wasn't around back on the ship. He had never liked to go to bed when she wasn't around. "Hey, Barry," he said softly. He knelt down next to him and patted his shoulder.

Barry startled awake. He looked around with wide eyes until he saw Taako and Lup, then relaxed. "Hey," he said sleepily.

"C'mon, time to get to bed," Taako said. He pulled Barry's arm up and around his shoulders, helping him to his feet. "There ya go."

Following behind, Lup added, "I'll settle down with you two as best as I can--I can sort of meditate in this state, at least. We can talk more tomorrow."

Barry flopped down on the bed. "I said I wasn't gonna go to sleep 'cause I just wanna spend time with you," he whined.

"I'll be here in the morning," Lup soothed. "It's okay, I'm always gonna be right here now."

"I know." Barry sniffled and reached up to wipe his eyes. He took his glasses off, and Taako put them on the side table. "I just...hey, Lup? I haven't slept in this body yet, but...even when I didn't have my memories, I...I had a lot of nightmares. I don't know what it's gonna be like now."

Taako sat down on the bed and yawned. "I mean, same, m'dude. We'll figure it out. It'll be okay." He was surprising himself by how gentle his voice was. In truth, he had forgotten that he  _ could _ be gentle like that.

Barry looked at him gratefully, touched by his honesty.

"I'll be here," Lup promised. "Even if I can't hold either of you--which I  _ hate _ , by the way--I'll be right here." She rested her form down at the foot of the bed. "Go to sleep, you'll both be okay."

"Night," Taako said. He grabbed one of the ample pillows on the bed and curled up around it. Something in his mind quieted for the first time in years, and he fell deeply asleep.

Barry was glad that Taako didn't reach for the light switch. With the lights on, he might be able to get some real sleep. He cast a long, loving glance at Lup. Even though she was a bit blurry without his glasses, he could tell that she was smiling at him. "Love you," he whispered, and fell asleep to the sound of her echoing the declaration.

Lup kept watch over the two of them through the night. When either of them seemed like they were becoming distressed in their sleep (Barry would make a soft whimpering sound and clench his fists, and Taako's ears pressed back against his head and his breathing became shallow whenever a nightmare was coming on), she would talk to them softly until they relaxed again. Neither woke up until morning.

"The sun's gonna rise in just a few hours," Merle realized. He could barely keep his eye open. "Whaddya say we turn in? I bet we could find some nice corner in that hotel to curl up in."

"Yeah." Davenport gathered the playing cards up and put them back in the box to hand to Merle. He rubbed his eyes. "Very late."

"Pretty early, really."

"Ha." There wasn't much energy in Davenport to find pedantic jokes funny, but he appreciated the effort that Merle was putting in.

Merle smiled, then yawned. "A'right, c'mon." He held his hand out and helped Davenport to his feet. They stumbled back into the hotel lobby. Despite his exhaustion telling him to just plunk down on the floor and fall asleep against a wall, he decided to wave over the human woman who seemed to be in charge, who was still awake and helping out the people who kept wandering in when they realized they had nowhere else to go that night.

"You're Merle Highchurch, right?" she said, almost awestruck.

"Yep, that's me." He turned the charm way up and smiled at her, trying to look like he wasn't about to fall over. "The Captain and I are...pretty tired. Don't suppose there's anywhere in this lovely establishment we could crash for the night?"

"Um, most of our rooms have already been taken up by refugees," the woman replied. She kept glancing at Davenport. "But I think there are a few that just became free because we reunited some families."

Davenport's head was hurting. He put his fingers to his temples. The card game had distracted him from the amount of memories still crowding into his mind, but now the stress was back. "Just somewhere quiet," he requested simply.

"Of course."

"You okay?" Merle whispered as the woman led them to a small room on the first floor.

"I…" That was all he could manage. The next words had come dangerously close to being  _ I'm Davenport _ , and that wouldn't do at all. It would probably make Merle worried, anyway.

"That's okay." Merle patted his shoulder. "We'll get some rest, buddy, you'll feel better tomorrow."

The room  _ was _ quiet. Davenport could breathe in here. He stood on his toes to pull a pillow and an extra blanket off of the bed to make a bit of a nest on the floor. He had always preferred that over sleeping on a bed, no matter how many times he had been told it was strange. On the moon base, it had just been another one of his quirks. Most of the BoB employees didn't seem to take much notice of it. Very few of them took much notice of him at all, really.

Merle sat down on the bed, his legs swinging off the side. "You good down there? Should I join you, or should I stay up here?" He didn't know if Davenport would prefer the company right now or not.

Gesturing for Merle to stay where he was, Davenport curled up in the nest and tucked his arms around the pillow as far as they would reach. His ears flicked back as he got comfortable.

"Goodnight, then, Capnport." For a moment, Merle found himself looking around for Magnus and Taako--he had spent so few nights away from them recently. Back on the ship, he had always been closest to Davenport out of all the crew members. But the bonds he had formed with Magnus and Taako weren't going to disappear with the reappearance of their former lives.  _ Pan help us, this is gonna take a hell of a lot of getting used to _ , he thought as he pulled the blankets over himself and turned the lights off except for one lamp in the corner. "See ya in the morning."

"It is morning," mumbled Davenport. "Shush."

Merle chuckled softly as he fell asleep.

The next day came, and the next, and the next, and they kept going--even though they didn't know where to go, they kept going.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm @johannsviolin on tumblr! Come chat with me and/or leave a comment and we can be friends forever. <3 ~Martin
> 
> P.S. I made this new pseud so I can post tons of short fics without flooding my main account here lmao. I have a few other TAZ fics there already but new ones will be posted here instead!


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